Watching LIVE via The Royal Family Channel on YouTube. Local time 6:00 am, London time 11:00 am.
6:02 am: Oh the bells!! The bells of St. Paul's Cathedral are going wild!
6:02 am: Oh here's Princess Anne. C'mon, I mean, she's a dike, right?
6:03 am: The people are showing up in droves now. Just a few minutes ago there was no one. Look at those ladies in fluorescent hot pink! Wonder what the Queen would think of that? I don't think she's due to this service this morning though, I think I read. She was seen on the balcony yesterday with others as the parade and fly-over happened. She looked good.
6:04 am: Oh, here's Prince Harry and his wife Meagan Markle. The crowd gave a loud cheer. Didn't hear any boos. He waved a normal "hi" back at them. No "royal wave."
6:09 am: Okay, we had a mad rush of like every uppity-coifed, nicely-perfumed ol' hag and hog for a few minutes there and now we're just looking at a wide shot of the front entrance and those incessant bells. Oh, the bells. They're driving me insane!
6:12 am: The camera hasn't moved. There's still a phalanx of people lining the steps, many in bright red...see:
6:14 am: Now we see a chocolate-red Rolls-Royce pull up. It has the royal insignia on it. It's Prince William and his wife Catherine. He gave a nice "how're ya" wave like his brother gave. Such nice boys. Their momma would've been so proud. He looks much better almost fully bald as opposed to that awkward wisp of blond combover he sported for years as if he wasn't losin' his hair. MPB, Your Highness, just own it!
6:15 am: The chat window is lively with well wishes from around the world. And of course, this being the high-class venue of YouTube, all are so well behaved in their comments.
6:18 am: Here's Chucky! I mean, His Royal Highness The Prince of Wales, of course. Startin' to get cheeky like these YouTube chatters.
Let's copy what some are writing, okay?
"Okay stop bells" (I wholeheartedly agree!!)
"!EWWW CAMILLA!"
"Meagan Markle and Harry, you are not belong here!"
"LONG LIVE GRANDMASTER HOGWARTS RAVES"
"RACISTS"
6:22 am: Oh, the screen just cut out for a second to some ITN scheduling information, then came back. Then went out again. I think someone in the director's booth is having a little liquid lunch over there.
6:24 am: Oh THANK YOU! The bells have finally stopped! Still just looking at that entrance shot though. So, let's go back to the chat:
"MY DOG STEPPED ON A BEE"
"GOD SAVE QUEEN CAMILLA"
"MEGAN OFFED HER FARTHUR" (Apparently Eliza Doolittle has joined the chat.)
6:27 am: Can hear a little low-volume intermittent background chatter, the slow beating of some drums and a pigeon or some other bird squawking. Can I go back to bed now?
6:31 am: Back to the scheduling card again. Went to check out other channels, they're getting their feed from the same source so it's the same. Not sure if this is how it's planned. Wait a minute: Now I'm actually reading the schedule and it has the next thing as DEPARTURES from St. Paul's at 1200 (7:00 am our time) WTF! I interrupted my life for a ten minute gawk at some decrepit ol' rich fucks hobbling up to a crumbling ol' church!?!
Screw you guys, I'm outta here.
But wait: Just a few more delicious chat comments, eh?
"To be blessed Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. STOP HATING PEOPLE YOU THINK YOU KNOW. They don't know you and don't really care about you!"
"MI6 CLOSED THE STREAM, LOSERS. I BEAT YOU EVERYWHERE"
"Those fur hats look really impractical. How are they soldiers supposed to fight in those things if something happens?"
"the queen and her family need to go to epsteins island and say there"
"Mohammed S Ficel And it is not for a human being that God should speak to him except by revelation or from behind a veil or sending a messenger and revealing by His permission whatever He wills ۚ Indeed, Ali is Wise"
"The queen is a reptilian!"
