Okay y'all, let me explain. This will, eventually, be a post featuring my review of my viewing of the last showing of Annie at Highlands Lakeside Theater here in my little "home town" in the butt-swipe of forgotten Florida, Sebring, or, what I've also come to know as Woonsocket South. But first, let me address a couple of things brought on by something I saw while at the theater this afternoon.
The title and the first picture here allude also to the sobriquet of "Woonsocket South" and, somewhat also, to "butt-swipe of Florida."
The picture, with the sun coming out on him no less, is of Tony Toler. If you do a search of his name on just this blog alone, you'll see I referenced him several times as one of the shining up-and-coming gems of this theater group. He started out as a teenager and grew both professionally and chronologically over the past few years to really fill the roles he played with total aplomb. He was like the kid I never had and I pinned such high hopes for him. When I hadn't seen him in the past few shows I assumed he went on to either matriculate at an institution of higher education to endeavor forward on a path more akin to his true goals or, if he indeed wanted to catch that shining star, he followed his dreams and sought to make his mark on the showbiz world by setting forth on his long yet rewarding journey to either New York or Hollywood. Go forth young man, grab your gusto, and reach for the stars!
But I saw on the advertisement LCD monitors they have scrolling before each performance a quick mention of his name and something like "if he made you smile here at HLT, he'll make you smile.." and I thought "Oh, is this some announcement that he's made it into some bigger theater group on his way to bigger things?" I didn't see 'cause the slideshow went too quickly. Next time 'round I made sure to pay mind though and...nope. It was an announcement that "Tony Toler, who made you smile here at HLT, is now available to make you smile behind the wheels of a new car at McPhails Auto Group."
Yep. This promising young man, with an abundance of theatrical acting and musical skill and talent that "pros" would die for, is now a fucking USED CAR SALESMAN.
This pic is from his Facebook which is primarily devoted to his attempts to get his family, friends, neighbors, and fans to buy shitty used cars from him, until he either realizes this line of work is a freaking scam or he gets kicked to the curb after his leads run dry. Either way, it's so, so sad. But, like the sobriquets suggest, so predictable. What happens to the uneducated young in small towns like my real hometown Woonsocket that have a ready and willing gristmill of low-end employment options available at the hands of those with the money and power that control it? What happens to the young and uneducated in butt-swipe Florida with the same M.O.? Some things never change.
Anyway, now on to our show...
Alright, as I was making my way from my car in the parking lot of the library, the usual place, towards the theater, a group of pre-teen girls and I guess their parents walking leisurely towards the theater. No big whoop. This is a big pull for them. It "speaks" to young girls, I would guess, and their ability to be self-advocates. But one of them had shockingly long, curly red hair and I thought, "Isn't that the girl playing Annie? But it's only 15 minutes until showtime? How can she be just now casually strolling in?" It turns out, I'd discover eventually, that there were more than a few "look-a-like Annies" attending in the audience today. Were these runoffs in the selection for the lead? Were they just wannabe's from various troupes? I dunno. But it was most perplexing, to be sure.
Our real lead was Emma McCandless, a local 13-year-old girl with the exact curly red locks, mnemonic memory of every lyric and line from the play and and the legacy of the family history in this area to cement her the role without question. After all, they probably own a big auto dealership franchise too. She was okay. She had the pipes. But her technical skills were entirely overshadowed by her complete lack of personality. For instance. In her scene with Sandy (which again, HLT used a "live" heavily-drugged dog for) Sandy was obviously distracted by something just off-stage, which was not scripted, so this threw Emma, and her performance was affected by it. She was visibly flustered by the stage issues rather than being a true performer and going with it. Because she knew her part by rote, and the fucking dog wasn't playing its part right! You could see Emma's frustration in her eyes. You could only imagine then if any of her human counterparts were equally "inept." I'm sure they wouldn't have made it this far. Makes you wonder how many flunked out of trials? Also, do I have to let you know what her type of actress would do with the songs as they relate to the feeling of the scenes? She had some technical skill, but it was lost on emotion. AI could have done a better job at imitating a human emotion. I know...all the parents out there...boo me for dissing a kid. Well, better now than later...I mean, her rendition of "Tomorrow" made me greatly wishing I had no tomorrows to look forward to...forever. Annie inspires suicide. Not good.
And frankly, the rest of the show was rather ho-hum. We're back to traditional HLT, folks. Gone is the magic of
Wizard of Oz or especially
Sweeney Todd...I dunno what spirits the director sold to the devil for the last one in particular but it looks like it was a one-off. It's butt-swipe theater especial once again, kiddies.
And frankly Annie, aka Emma, your suck-up friends and fam may have given you standing ovations and bouquets today...yes, enjoy, by all means. But if you don't make something of this flame in your heart, if you truly do have it, and let this "
terrible despite" claim you too as its next victim, then I indeed pity you.
Better find out how you can coax that couple into getting the rust-proofing protection package, you betcha.
