Brown skies smilin' at me
Nothin' but brown skies do I see
Blackbirds singin' a song
Nothin' but brown skies from now on
AP Newswire -
Sacramento, California
California governor Gavin Newsom, clearly emboldened beyond words after his recent thwarting of a recall attempt on his dominion, has signed into law that skies over the state shall be made a constant neutral hue of brown.
"For too long Californians have had to endure the entitlement and discrimination of the sky. We pass legislation today that will have our 10-year-old gender-neutral citizens no longer fear the male dominance from above. No longer will little ones have to look up and gaze at the oppression from on high. Now when a little girl, female-empowering boy or non-binary, fluid, quazi-androgynous somethefuck peers into the ether, they'll see nothing but equality blanketing our fair state."
The new legislation, inspired, sources have said, by a child who asked their/her/its (pronouns un-assumed) parent "Mommy, why is the sky blue?" In response, that little girl's mother imagined the pain her daughter was feeling since cis-gendered, male-dominated society had well indoctrinated their "blue is for boys, pink is for girls" evil bias into marketing campaigns for decades. She immediately speed-dialed her representative (labelled as "I Be Trigger'd!!" on her phone) and before long, a bill appeared on the desk of Governor Newsom mandating California's industry to rapidly pump massive quantities of dusty brown smoke into the air to change the skies from Misogynists' Blue to ALL Genders Brown. Newsom signed the bill instantly and also recommended that the rampant wildfires across the state be allowed to ravage free across the land as the dark plumes billowing into the atmosphere could only help right this terrible wrong.
In other news today, the skies over California have just applied for status as a threatened minority and have petitioned the state legislature to halt what it calls "racist corporate-sanctioned systemic rape."
"For too long the Californian sky, now to be designated as a Sky Of Color, have had to endure the persistent and virulent rape by the phallic-shaped airplanes ramming through our soon-to-be Beautiful Brown-ness. We call an end to this now!"
The airline industry had no comment at this time.