TRAVELOGUE: St. Louis, Missouri



I originally scheduled this trip during negotiations for a property I'd made an offer on and although the deal fell through since the owner rejected my offer, I decided to keep the trip and explore around the area to see what the atmosphere of the region was and whether I could see myself living there or not. And, since the web deals made couldn't be refunded, I just wanted to make the best of my expenses.

Saturday, February 16, 2019

Got on my 8:18 pm flight after a couple beers both at home and at the "On The Border" restaurant at the gate at OIA. A quick flight featuring a couple more beers, and I'm in St. Louis. The airport surprisingly didn't seem much bigger that Rhode Island's T.F.Green Airport. The place was pretty much dead by the time I landed. Made my way to the taxi stand since I didn't think my hotel shuttle was still running at 10:30 at night. (Later I found out he may well have been available had I know...pays to research well before your trip.)

Cool hotel. America's Extended Stay. Had a little kitchenette in the unit. This turned out to be very handy indeed. Shopped at a nearby Schnuck's Supermarket and made Marsala chicken and rice along with canned raviolis for the next two days of meals. First time ever buying raw chicken and cooking it stove-top in a hotel. But for this first night, I walked over to the nearby Friday's attached to the next door hotel. On the way, I scooped up a handful of snow and delightedly made a snowball. I hadn't touched snow in well over twenty years and I was grinning, like a kid, ear to ear.

Sunday, February 17, 2019

I woke early despite my hangover since I needed to take the shuttle from the hotel, back to the airport and pick up my Hertz rental car. From there, after I squeezed myself into my tiny and cramped Hyundai Accent, I drove to downtown St. Louis and scoped out the area of the Chariton house I had bid on and then made my way south to Mehlville and walked around in an almost-dead mall there. I wanted to get a jist of the typical South County resident and a feel for the environment.

After a tasty cherry mocha frappachino from a Starbucks kiosk deep in this labyrinthine mall, I made my way back to the city proper. But before I left, I noticed that the mall, having some areas of varying elevation, designed sets of stairs from one mini-level to the next in at least two locations that went up a mere 5 feet or so. That's not the weird part...I've seen that in many malls, but here they had not only the 10 or so steps you could take but also a tiny escalator. But wait, they also had the nearby elevator which also made the tiny trip. No I get it, people have mobility issues, but they could have just had a ramp for that!


Being in close proximity while checking out the Mt. Pleasant area earlier I found my way over to the Anheuser-Busch brewery but it hadn't opened yet so now around 12:30 I went back. I took the "Bud Light" tour for $10 and I gotta say, I thought it was well worth it. I texted Ric telling him that this was like Willy Wonka for adults!


After a brief overview in the main admissions building from our two tour guides, our grouping of about 30 people made its way outside (in the 35 degree cold) then inside to the 80 degree Clydesdale stable (the most posh stable you could ever imagine).



After another trip back outside we go into the beechwood aging room (which stunk much more than the relatively odorless stable, considering).


Then back out, and in again at the super hot (like maybe 100 degrees) brewing plant.








We also got the tour of the BEVO packaging plant inside this 1914 building with this awesome arts and crafts period tiled foyer. On the 7th floor we got an overview of this massive facility which really looked like you'd be able to spot Laverne and Shirley at work down there.



Of course, just like the good ol' days when this company used to own SeaWorld, we got our free samples. No sneaking any tiny sips here though, I pretty much chugged them with nary a thought.


Monday, February 18, 2019

I was really dragging today. After the brewery tour I'd added to my sample-filled belly another six-pack of Bud Light along with the above mentioned in-room cooked dinner and I was feeling it bad. Two rough hangover mornings in a row. Ugh. It took me a few hours to get my ass in gear so I really had to whittle down my plans for the day. I decided to definitely visit my main objective though...the Gateway Arch.


Even as a kid learning about this awesome monument I've been fascinated by it. Seeing it up close and in person sure didn't disappoint. I remember being nervous about going up in the unique elevator cars to the top thinking I was going to be both claustrophobic and acrophobic but it was totally fine. The cars are tiny and I'm sure I looked comical squished in there with 4 strangers in this five seat bubble but it was fine. At the top, I didn't feel skittish at all. Though, admittedly, the windows are so tiny you really couldn't get too wary. This steel arch was high but very solid. I took a few pictures but then it started getting crammed with people so I made my way to the cars to go down. I had planned on visiting this on Monday instead of Sunday in order to hopefully avoid crowds but wouldn't you know it, today was a holiday (President's Day) so many people came here on their day off. It was like I was back home at Disney!





After buying my souvenir photos ($29) and magnet ($3.95) I drove across the Mississippi River into Illinois to check out another cheap house area, Granite City. You want industrial wasteland? You got it! This place has it all. Pothole infested roads, massive railroad interchanges, huge mounds of coal, dirty, grey everything...dinky houses, boarded up stores, rust-covered cars, billowing clouds of steam and smoke from the many factory chimneys. And a pervasive smell of burning rubber. But, I found the house I was considering. And it's cheap. So.....I don't know. It might be VanLife for me.

Driving back into Missouri and passing house after house in varying degrees of decay, and almost as much grey and despair as nearby Granite City, I was thinking again about living here. Yes, of course, it's winter and the landscape ain't so pretty this far north around now, but that's why I was actually happy I chose now to check it out. This is the environment for this area for a good 4-5 months every year. I ask myself...what was a major factor in my original decision to move from New England to Florida in 1997? And was that not again reinforced by the New London Syndrome? Things to ponder...is it worth the bargain?

Back around the airport area I made my way over to the casino that a YouTube vlogger I follow calls his usual stomping ground. Hollywood Casino just to the east of St. Charles, MO. I had given a ten spot to a beggar on the street in downtown St. Louis so I thought I'd have lucky karma coming my way and I threw four twenties into a Draw Poker machine. I guess karma doesn't work that way since I was down over $30 in just a few minutes. I cashed out and popped my ticket into a slot machine near the poker room. I didn't see my vlogger in there. Nor did I ever see my money either. It was gone in ten minutes flat with only a few paltry bleeps and blips. Of course no bonus plays for me. Cashed out for 3 cents which, of course, I would not embarrass myself to present to the cashier (nor the ATM-like cashier machine either), I just threw it away. And speaking of throwing away things, count another 2 twenties in that mix. All told, I lost $84. (Well, I guess $83.97 technically). Hey but they had free soda dispensers so I suppose I could look at it as not a total loss.

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Didn't sleep well so got up at 3:30, out by 4:30 and returned the car by 5:00. My 7:00 flight back to Orlando was hot and bumpy and I was swollen, achy and grouchy. The kid in the seat next to me was fidgety and this old lady behind me would not shut the fuck up. She kept rattling on in her Mid-Western nasally drawl interspersed by an occasional witch-like cackle here and there. I pantomimed putting bullets in a revolver, placing it up to my head and pulling the trigger. No one saw me but I didn't really care if they did.

Despite the way I was feeling, as we got closer and closer to our destination, I could see and hear other passengers getting giddy and excited as I'm sure most of them were mid-westerners on their way to a long-planned-for, well-saved-for, mid-winter Florida vacation.

On the drive home in sunny 85 degree weather surrounded by green grass and palm trees, I couldn't help but think...there's no place like home.